yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
