There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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