No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Come share oat with me in your robe
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