bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
