Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
it's like heaven, but drunker
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize
