i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize