We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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