I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize
