For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
