Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Randomize
