that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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