The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
