how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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