White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Randomize
