But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
