Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
The adults are the big ones right?
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
