Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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