The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize