My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
