He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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