Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Couch. On fire.
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