Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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