so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
