I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
