It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
and she was petting her beer can
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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