i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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