David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
