Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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