I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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