even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
