I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
now i know why i became what i already was.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
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