so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
