Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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