Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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