its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
