you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize