is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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