love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
