he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize