sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
