so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
