So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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