You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
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