I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
