This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
My bed is full of blood and feathers
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
