i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Randomize
