ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Such a big mess for such a small penis
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
