I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
