Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
