he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I puked a lego.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I'm both gender and math confused
ok first of all what the fuck
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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